


I See You Hurting, I Do What I Can

by gooberAscendant



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, BDSM, Blood, Exhibitionism, F/F, Incest, Mommy Issues, Mommy Kink, Polyamory, Temporary Character Death, Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-23
Updated: 2014-05-23
Packaged: 2018-01-26 06:30:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,354
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1678220
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/gooberAscendant/pseuds/gooberAscendant
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Kanaya attempts to get Rose to act on an unexpected desire.</p><p>AU (Canon-Divergence): All of the living kids and troll kids, as of the Gigapause, survive to live in a new universe, on a planet populated by humans and trolls. A few years have passed since the end of the game.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I See You Hurting, I Do What I Can

Rose’s fingers snaked their way down her exposed chest and past her navel, ending just barely underneath the fabric of her lace panties before tracing back upwards. The motion was exaggerated, and just a little bit forced, but she figured it would do the trick.

A sharp breath from the dark beyond the edge of the bed told her she was right.

Two small glints of yellow light were all she could see of Kanaya beyond the two large stage lights set up to illuminate the bed. Rose had at first found the prospect of performing in this way odd. But now, feeling the troll’s eyes fixated on her, knowing Kanaya watched her every move, anticipated her, lusted after her… it was exhilarating.

Her fingers meandered over her breasts, brushing by her nipples on occasion as if distracted by something more interesting. This was a production in tantalization, and she aimed to make her hidden observer wait as long as she could manage.

She had already spent an unreasonable amount of time undressing. Removing her shirt one button at a time. Posing about for a while before undoing her skirt. Pulling down her socks, inch by inch by inch, one at a time. And finally spending a few minutes holding her unclasped bra — a lacy purple number that matched the panties she still wore — pressed against her body, barely still covering her breasts, before finally letting it fall.

But her own patience had its limits, and the moment to move along was fast approaching.

Her movements grew ever more focused, circling her areolas and flicking over her nipples. She let out a few soft moans, only partially for the benefit of the troll watching her.

Removing one hand from from its place hovering above her breast, she slipped it beneath her remaining undergarment, this time with much more purpose than showmanship.

She let out a short gasp as her fingers passed over her clitoris and into her wetness. Kanaya’s name almost escaped her lips, but she held it back. Their arrangement was very specific. She was not to acknowledge her spectator’s presence in any way, lest she ruin the illusion of the unknown voyeur. But her composure was fast dissolving. She would need to distract herself with thoughts of someone else before it was gone entirely.

She pulled her slick fingers back up, running them across her lips and licking at the dew left behind. She imagined the taste was someone else’s, taking her fingers into her mouth to suck them clean. A mysterious, attractive stranger, perhaps? Yes. That would do nicely.

Her other hand found its way back under her panties while she tasted herself – no, this mystery woman – on her fingers. The figure seemed to know exactly what Rose wanted, rubbing her clit just right, stopping to enter her or trace her lips at just the right moments. “Oh, yes, please!” she pleaded with the indistinct figure in her mind.

She pulled down her last garment and threw it aside, all pretense of exaggerated delay dismissed, and spread her legs for the benefit of both the imaginary woman and her very real girlfriend.

Switching hands to get more of a taste of this mystery girl, she spread herself open with the fingers she had just finished suckling. Imagining her mystery lover kneeling between her legs, she mimicked the motions of a tongue with her fingers as best she could. Moans, words of encouragement, and pleading escaped her lips in increasing frequency.

The mystery figure’s eyes looked up at her. Eyes filled with such desire. Whose eyes? Rose began to imagine different women licking her, tasting her. Jade’s adorable eyes. Yes. Such a perverse image. Her innocent friend with that button nose doing something so filthy. “Oh fuck, yes!”

Terezi’s eyes, hidden under red glasses, her long, wicked tongue tasting inside. “Lick me!”

Jane’s caring eyes. A smile on her face while she eagerly licks. Almost there.

Roxy’s perfect, beautiful eyes.

Uh-oh.

The same eyes her mother had.

Shit.

And that same, flawless face.

Abort.

“Oh, fuck me, Roxy!”

Fuck.

Rose quivered and gasped as she came.

******

grimAuxiliatrix [GA] began trolling tipsyGnostalgic [TG]

GA: It Seems That I Was Correct In My Assessment.  
TG: hi kanaya  
TG: how r you  
TG: on this fine day  
GA: Yes Please Excuse Me  
GA: I Forget That The Length Of Time Separating Communiques Dictates The Amount Of “Catching Up” That Must Occur Prior To Beginning The Conversation Proper  
GA: But I Believe You Will Be Interested Enough In The Information I Am To Provide That You May Be Willing To Overlook This Transgression  
TG: well  
TG: maybe i can forgive u  
TG: just this once  
TG: if the infos juicy enuff  
GA: I Believe You Will Find That It Is Freshly Squeezed And Served With Eggs And Toast  
TG: oh snap  
TG: part of this balanced breakfast?  
GA: The Balance Of The Breakfast Could Not Be Thrown Off Even By The Addition Of Gratuitous Pan Fried Snoutbeast Slices And An Entire Box Of Chocolate Ring Pastries  
TG: an earthquake wipes out the entire countryside  
TG: except one table still stands  
TG: w this breakfast on it  
TG: because  
TG: its balance just cant be thrown  
GA: Because Of How Juicy This Juice Is  
TG: yes  
TG: cool  
TG: so  
TG: whats up?  
GA: Through Careful Analysis  
GA: I Have Concluded That Rose Does In Fact Find You Sexually Desirable  
TG: whoa what  
TG: r u sure  
TG: i mean  
TG: did she say sumthin?  
GA: It Was More Of A Moan But Yes  
TG: fukc  
TG: *fuck  
TG: wat did she say???  
GA: She Called Out Your Name At The Moment Of Climax  
TG: oh  
TG: uh  
TG: wihle u 2 were  
TG: ??????  
GA: I Was Merely Observing  
GA: She Did Not Say Your Name In Place Of Mine If That Is Your Concern  
TG: observin?  
GA: Yes  
TG: observin rose?  
GA: Correct  
TG: like spyin on her w hidden cams  
TG: from ur secret basement lair?  
GA: Sort Of  
GA: We Have Not Yet Employed Cameras  
GA: And She Knows I Am There  
GA: But We Pretend That She Does Not  
TG: thats  
TG: p kinky  
GA: Yes  
TG: and  
TG: p hot  
GA: Oh Yes  
GA: I Quite Like  
GA: To Watch  
TG: i c  
TG: anf she said my name?  
TG: *and  
GA: During Orgasm Yes  
TG: fuck  
TG: shit  
TG: sum other curse words cus im too overwhelmded to think o more  
TG: *overwhelmed  
GA: May I Suggest Nooksucker  
TG: u may  
GA: Very Well Then  
GA: I Suggest Nooksucker  
TG: ur suggestion is noted  
TG: but  
TG: i have decided to go w  
TG: ass  
GA: A Reserved Yet Appropriate Choice  
TG: thx  
TG: so  
TG: wat exactly did she say?  
TG: when she  
TG: was cummin  
GA: Are You Sure You Are Ready To Hear It  
TG: im goin fuckin crazy here kanaya  
TG: jus tell me already  
GA: Very Well  
GA: Her Exact Words Were  
GA: “Oh, fuck me, Roxy!”  
TG: o my gog  
TG: *gof  
TG: holy  
TG: fuckin  
TG: shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit  
GA: And You Did Not Believe Me When I Said She Is As Attracted To You As You Are To Her  
TG: ok  
TG: mayb u were rite  
TG: but  
TG: theirs still no way itd  
TG: actually hapen  
GA: Perhaps  
GA: And Perhaps Not  
GA: I Have A Plan  
TG: rly?  
GA: Yes  
GA: But There Are Pieces That Must Fall Into Place Before I Can Explain  
GA: I Do Not Wish To Raise Your Hopes Prematurely  
TG: :(  
GA: But Believe Me When I Say  
GA: I Will Do Everything In My Power To Make Your Dreams Come True  
TG: thank u

grimAuxiliatrix [GA] ceased trolling tipsyGnostalgic [TG]  
tipsyGnostalgic [TG] began pestering grimAuxiliatrix [GA]

TG: wait  
TG: u just wana watch us fuck  
TG: dont u?  
GA: Is That A Problem  
TG: hm  
TG: i guess not  
TG: ;)

tipsyGnostalgic [TG] ceased pestering grimAuxiliatrix [GA]

******

“I have been thinking.” Kanaya broke the long silence, peering over the top of her book.

“Oh dear. Thinking can lead to dangerous, dark places, not to be trifled with lightly. Perhaps I should finish my tea lest the impact cause me to spill.” Rose lowered her own book to meet her girlfriend’s gaze across the patio table. She continues to make no attempt to actually drink the now cold beverage she still held from hours earlier. It was the idea of tea that made the afternoon classy. Actually drinking it was immaterial.

“Yes, that is a wise decision. These thoughts could indeed be so shocking as to result in an unfortunate heated leaf-water based accident.”

Rose closed her book. “What precisely is the nature of these thoughts? Have you perhaps imagined additional dastardly sexual deviances you wish for us to take part in? Or are these thoughts more akin to deep emotional analysis, digging at the very roots of our respective psyches?”

“They are most assuredly dastardly, perhaps the most dastardly yet. But they may also at the very least pluck at some of the more obvious roots of the tree that we are now using to represent our minds.”

“Roots that have emerged partially from the dirt, where they have already been responsible for the skinned knees of a number of local neighborhood children?”

“Yes, those roots exactly.”

Rose moved to take a sip of tea, but instead wrinkled her nose and set it down. “What is it you would like to talk about, Kanaya?”

“It is a tad embarrassing without the thin veil of metaphor I have begun to grow so fond of in these past moments.”

“Darling, you have spent four of the past five evenings watching me pleasure myself from the dark. Perhaps the time for embarrassment at your aberrant carnal desires is past.”

“Perhaps. It is just…” Kanaya stared at the tea now abandoned on the table. “It concerns your outburst the other night.”

“The outburst that I told you I did not want to talk about?”

“Yes, that outburst exactly.”

“And yet here we are discussing it.”

“I liked it.” Kanaya finally looked up.

“You liked it?” Rose lifted a single eyebrow.

“Quite a bit, actually. And I was wondering if you would perhaps be willing to—”

“Do it again?” Rose almost sounded eager, at least to a trained ear.

“Or something approximating it.”

“I believe we can come to some sort of arrangement, if you are willing to forego tonight’s scheduled voyeurism in favor of a more direct role.”

“What precisely did you have in mind?”

******

_SMACK!_

Rose yelped at the impact of Kanaya’s palm on her bare posterior.

“You have been exceptionally bad, have you not?” Kanaya stood behind Rose, who was bent over, elbows resting on the bed, skirt hiked up, and panties — purple again, though lacking lace this time — around her ankles. For the first time in three days, the stage lights had been pushed aside in favor of more ordinary lighting.

“Um, yes.”

_SMACK!_

“Excuse me?”

“Yes… mother.” Rose barely whispered the last word.

_SMACK!_

“Speak up, darling.”

“Yes, mother.”

“Yes you will speak up or yes you have been exceptionally bad?”

“...Both?”

“Good.”

 _SMACK!_ _SMACK!_ _SMACK!_

Rose squirmed and squeezed her eyes closed. She was beginning to question what she had gotten herself into. Not the— _SMACK!_ Not the spanking, of course. That was business as usual.

“Thank you, mother.” Yes, there is was. The source of the question.

On the one hand, the embarrassment alone was causing her to become quite wet, and the— _SMACK!_ And the pain was not exactly hindering this development. But on the other— _SMACK!_ On the other hand, was she really okay with pretending to be disciplined by her mother for sexual thrills?

The spanking paused. Rose braced herself, and flinched when Kanaya’s hand brushed over her reddening behind. Kanaya’s fingers found their way between the bent over girl’s legs.

Rose was suddenly okay with a lot of things.

“Is this what you want, Rosey baby?” Kanaya’s index finger curled its way inside.

Rose gasped. “Yes, mother.”

“And you would like more?”

“Yes, mother.”

Kanaya pulled her hand away. Rose whimpered.

“Then you will be required to ask. Nicely.”

“Please continue, mother.”

“Continue what, Rosey?”

“To, um, touch me like you were, mother.”

“You must be more specific, sweetheart.”

“Please continue fingering my pussy.” Rose’s face grew redder than her rear.

“Excuse me?”

Rose swore under her breath. “Please continue fingering my pussy, mother.”

Kanaya’s nails scraped across the bruises forming on Rose’s ass. Her nails were cut unfortunately short for this purpose, but fortunately short for her next move. Her touch became lighter when she reached Rose’s inner thigh. She brushed past Rose’s labia, then slid her index and middle fingers inside.

Rose moaned. Kanaya’s fingers began to move, in and out but also twisting and flicking back and forth over each other. Rose moaned louder.

“Does mother know what her baby girl likes?” The crash course in proper human wiggler terminology Rose had given Kanaya prior to their escapade were clearly paying off.

“Yes, mother,” Rose managed between heavy breaths.

 _SMACK!_ _SMACK!_ Kanaya put her other hand to good use, returning it to spanking duties.

“Mm, fuck!” Rose moaned louder still.

“Tell me, Rosey.” _SMACK!_ “Do good girls—” _SMACK!_ “—ask their mothers to finger their pussies?” _SMACK!_

“No, mother.” Rose’s legs were shaking, struggling to keep her up.

“Then what would that make you, dear?” _SMACK!_

“A bad girl—” _SMACK!_ “A bad girl, mother.”

 _SMACK!_ “That is correct.” _SMACK!_ “You are a naughty, filthy child.”

“Yes, mother.” _SMACK!_

“Tell me—” _SMACK!_ “—that you are a filthy child.” _SMACK!_

“I am a filthy child, mother!”

 _SMACK!_ “Again.”

“I am a filthy—” _SMACK!_ “A filthy child, mother!” _SMACK!_ The pleasure was building up inside her. Every strike, every perverse thing she was made to say, and every movement of the fingers inside her drove her ever closer. “Mother—” _SMACK!_ “Mother I am going to come.”

 _SMACK!_ “Are you now?” _SMACK!_ “Do you not require mother’s permission for such an action?” _SMACK!_

“Please, mother!” Rose could barely think.

 _SMACK!_ “Please what?”

“Please may—” _SMACK!_ “Please may I come, mother?”

 _SMACK!_ “You wish to come from your mother’s fingers?”

“Yes, mother.”

 _SMACK!_ “Fingers that held you as a baby?”

“Please, mother!”

 _SMACK!_ “Fingers that prepared your food?”

“Please yes, mother!”

 _SMACK!_ “Tell me” _SMACK!_ “that you are a dirty,” _SMACK!_ “filthy little child” _SMACK!_ “that wishes to come on her mother’s fingers.” _SMACK!_

“I… I am a” _SMACK!_ “dirty, filthy little—” _SMACK!_ “—little child that—” _SMACK!_ “—that wishes to come on—” _SMACK!_ “—on her mother’s—” _SMACK!_ “—on her mother’s fingers.” _SMACK!_

“That is correct, Rosey.” _SMACK!_ “Now come for mother.”

Rose finally let the wave of pleasure rush over her, convulsing, screaming, squeezing Kanaya’s fingers inside her. When it had finally passed, collapsed to her knees and let her elbows slip out from under her, leaving her stomach resting on the bed. Tears streamed down her cheeks.

******

Kanaya sat on the edge of the bed and let her hand rest on the back of the now bawling girl lying next to her. “Such a sweet little girl.”

“Kanaya,” Rose managed amid sobs.

“Now Rosey…” Kanaya considered her options for reprimanding this sudden break of—

“R-red.”

Oh.

“Are you injured? What do you need?” What if Rose was really hurt? What if she was angry? What if she could never look at Kanaya the same way anymore? Kanaya’s heart was racing, but not as fast as her thoughts.

Rose sunk down to a sitting position next to the bed. Kanaya followed, kneeling beside her and frantically looking her over for injuries. She looked unhurt, but she was shaking violently.

“I’m not,” Rose sobbed, “in— injured.” She leaned into an embrace, clinging to Kanaya and crying into her chest.

“What can I do? How can I help you? What’s wrong?”

“Kanaya...”

“What is it?”

“Shut up and— and hold me.” The snarkiness shining through her tears was heartening, at least. Kanaya held her tight.

The two sat together until Rose’s sobbing subsided into gentle sniffling. Kanaya kissed the top of her head. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

“Do you wish to discuss what is wrong, or would you like me to shut up for a while longer?”

“Your shutting up was appreciated.” Rose looked up from the nest her face had made in Kanaya’s shirt. Tears still lingered in her eyes, but the corners of her mouth hinted at a smile. “But it is probably for the best to get this off of my chest.”

“Speaking of which, are you comfortable where you are? Would you rather relocate? Do you need water?”

“I’m alright here. And I promise that I will have water later.”

“Good. Proper hydration is very important.”

“So you say after every scene.” 

“And it only gets truer with each telling.”

Rose nestled back into Kanaya’s cleavage, muffling her voice. “Thank you.”

“What for?”

“For caring for me like you do.”

“Are you sure you don’t hate me?”

“Why would I hate you?”

“For… well… this?”

Rose’s face emerged once more. “This isn’t your fault, Kanaya.”

“Are you sure? The roleplay scenario was my idea.”

“An idea I jumped at. Which I believe may have been a mistake on my part, not yours.”

“Did you not enjoy it as much as you had hoped?”

“Just the opposite. I am afraid I enjoyed it too much.”

“Too much?” Kanaya’s head tilted in obvious confusion.

“It seemed delightfully perverse in theory, but in practise, I found myself increasingly aroused by the thought of my actual mother.”

“Was this not desirable?”

“Within the context of make believe, yes, but there are boundaries between fantasy and reality. In real life, it is not okay to feel that way about one’s mother.”

“Then I believe I misjudged what it was about this idea that you were interested in. I meant to allow you to fulfil a real desire.”

“One that seems, to my discomfort, to actually exist.” Rose let out a sigh. “Was it that obvious?”

“Your manner in regards to your mother, as well as her alternate universe counterpart, is consistent with the behaviors exhibited by those experiencing taboo feelings of incestuous lust.”

“A field in which you have recently become an expert?”

“In a manner of speaking, though my research includes only a small sample size of the human species.”

“Have you been speaking with Davesprite?”

“Yes, though I must admit—” Kanaya took a deep breath. “—my primary source of comparison is in fact Roxy.”

Rose’s eyes widened. Her breath became short. Her knuckles turned white gripping Kanaya’s shirt. “What did she tell you?”

“Suffice it to say that she expressed genuine sexual interest in you, as well as your counterpart that acted as her maternal figure.”

“Shit.” Tears began to make a reappearance in Rose’s eyes.

“I should not have said anything. I am sorry.”

“No. You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“I do not believe that is true, given your discomfort. I pushed you towards this fantasy in an attempt to make you accept these feelings and thereby lead you into a rendezvous with Roxy.”

Rose released her tight grip and pulled back into a sitting position, her eyes meeting Kanaya’s gaze for a moment before fixating on the floor.

“Do you now hate me?” Kanaya already knew the answer, but still wanted to hear it.

Rose shook her head, choking back more tears. “I still don’t hate you, Kanaya. But you should have told me.”

“I am sorry. I am so sorry.” It was now Kanaya’s turn to cry.

Rose leaned closer and wiped the tears from Kanaya’s cheeks, then planted a kiss on the tip of her nose. “Shhh. I know. You didn’t mean to hurt me.” Rose smiled and wiped away her own tears. “Except in the way I like, of course.”

“Thank you.” Kanaya nodded, and attempted a smile of her own with moderate success. “Now about that water...”

******

tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering tipsyGnostalgic [TG]

TT: We need to talk about this.  
TG: this?  
TT: The elephant in the room, as it were.  
TG: is that y all my peanuts keep goin missin?  
TT: Actually, scratch the elephant.  
TT: I would prefer if we dispensed with the usual meaningless metaphorical run around this time.  
TG: ok  
TG: just this once  
TG: 4 you  
TG: the elephant is gone  
TG: even tho  
TG: i had this great bit  
TG: where the elephant was on the run from the circus  
TT: Thank you.  
TG: so  
TG: to return 2 my previous question  
TG: this?  
TT: Kanaya tells me you have been experiencing attraction towards me.  
TG: oh  
TG: um  
TG: shit  
TT: Yes.  
TT: Shit.  
TG: im srory  
TG: *sorry  
TG: i think  
TT: Don’t be sorry.  
TT: These things happen.  
TG: they do?  
TG: have u been talkin to davesprite?  
TT: Yes, but I was speaking from more personal experience on this particular matter.  
TG: u mean…..  
TG: …….  
TG: ????  
TT: Yes.  
TT: Kanaya was apparently correct in her analysis.  
TG: !!!!!!!  
TT: That sure is a lot of shout poles you’ve got there.  
TG: yea  
TG: well  
TG: their justifies  
TG: *justified  
TG: given  
TG: the situaiton  
TG: *situatino  
TG: *fuckit  
TT: Yes, that may be true.  
TT: But I suspect that they represent an excitement that may be premature.  
TG: wat do u mean?  
TT: Roxy, think about it.  
TT: Do you honestly believe anything good could come of this?  
TG: but u  
TG: jsut said  
TG: i mean  
TG: u feel the same way rite?  
TT: To be perfectly clear, yes, I find myself thoroughly attracted to you.  
TT: Quite likely as a result of unresolved issues with my mother, to whom you unsurprisingly bear a striking resemblance.  
TT: But these feelings cannot possibly be healthy, regardless of how requited they may be.  
TG: rosey  
TG: i no a thing or 2  
TG: about  
TG: mother issues  
TG: but  
TG: u arent my mom  
TG: despite the afoermentoned strikin resemblance  
TG: *aforementioned  
TG: and the ectogenetics or whatev  
TG: so even though u remind me of her  
TG: and even though ive always had a kinda thing for her  
TG: im into you cuz of who you r  
TG: not becuz ur her  
TG: and i thought maybe  
TG: despite ur own mom stuff  
TG: u could see me  
TG: as more than just ur mom too?  
TT: I don’t know.  
TT: My feelings towards her have become more complicated given this recent development.  
TT: You may be right in so far as you are not her, at least in the sense that my relationship with her does not directly carry over to you.  
TT: But you remind me so much of her.  
TT: I don’t think that I can entirely separate the two of you in my mind.  
TG: i no what u mean  
TG: but  
TG: what if  
TG: thats ok?  
TT: If you are suggesting that it would be therapeutic to sleep with you, my reaction to Kanaya and my latest roleplay excursion would speak against you.  
TG: roleplay?  
TT: She took the role of my mother.  
TT: It seemed like a good idea at first, but ended in tears.  
TT: And that is precisely what will happen if we pursue this any further.  
TT: So please, for both our sakes, put it out of your mind.  
TG: what if  
TG: we just  
TT: Roxy.  
TT: I care about you, and I don’t want to hurt you.  
TT: Which is why the answer is no.  
TG: :(  
TT: We will speak again later, but not about this.  
TT: Understood?  
TG: i guess…  
TT: Good.

tentacleTherapist [TT] ceased pestering tipsyGnostalgic [TG]

******

grimAuxiliatrix [GA] began trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG]

GA: I Have Come To The Conclusion That Rose Is Not In Fact Still Upset With Me  
GA: And That Her Continued Sour Mood Is Instead The Result Of Her Inner Conflict Regarding Roxy  
CG: REALLY?  
CG: IMAGINE THAT.  
CG: JUST LIKE I TOLD YOU TWO FUCKING DAYS AGO.  
GA: As Always Your Insight Into The Human Psyche Is Second To None  
CG: YOU’RE DAMN RIGHT IT IS.  
CG: I AM UP TO MY ASS IN BULLSHIT HUMAN PSYCHOLOGY ON A DAILY BASIS.  
CG: CROWN ME EMPEROR AND BOW DOWN TO MY UNASSAILABLE WISDOM REGARDING ALIEN THINKPANS AND THEIR MORONIC OBSESSION WITH GENETIC RELATION.  
GA: Have You Been Speaking With Davesprite  
CG: WHO ELSE?  
CG: THE FEATHERY ASSHOLE TALKS ABOUT NOTHING BUT HIS INSATIABLE BROTHER THIRST.  
CG: AND AS THE RESIDENT EMPEROR OF THE HUMAN MIND, AND NEED I REMIND YOU MASTER OF ALL THINGS ROMANCE, I’M THE ONE HE COMES FLOATING TO WHENEVER NO ONE ELSE IS ENOUGH OF A DUMB SHIT TO GET ROPED INTO ONE OF HIS INSUFFERABLE SOB FESTS.  
GA: An Entirely Unnecessary Reminder  
GA: Your Mastery Of Romance Has Never And Never Will Be In Question  
CG: YOU QUESTION MY ADVICE EVERY TIME WE TALK.  
GA: Only To Keep Your Keen Relationship Senses Sharp I Assure You  
CG: AS IF THEY NEED IT.  
CG: MY SENSES ARE CONSTANTLY GROUND ON THE WHETSTONES OF MY FRIENDS’ PERPETUALLY IMPLODING RELATIONSHIPS.  
CG: THEY ARE SO SHARP THEY COULD SMELL A LOVE TRIANGLE FROM THE OTHER SIDE OF A FETID SWAMP FILLED TO THE BRIM WITH THE PUTREFYING CORPSES OF FAILED KISMESSITUDES PAST.  
CG: THEY COULD CUT AN UNSTABLE QUADRANT VACILLATION CLEAN IN HALF BEFORE ANYONE HAS A CHANCE TO BAT A JEALOUS EYE.  
CG: SOLDIERS MARCH TO WAR WITH BLADES THAT THEY WISH WERE HALF AS FUCKING SHARP.  
GA: These Senses Are Both Figuratively And Literally Sharp Then  
CG: OK THAT ONE GOT AWAY FROM ME.  
CG: THE POINT IS YOU SHOULD LISTEN TO ME BECAUSE MY ADVICE IS ALWAYS INFALLIBLE.  
GA: Of Course You Are Right  
GA: About Both Your Advice And That Metaphor Getting Away From You  
GA: Speaking Of Which I Could Use Some Advice Right Now  
CG: WELL AS A VERITABLE VENDING MACHINE OF THE STUFF, YOU MAY AS WELL TELL ME WHAT’S GOING ON.  
GA: I Am Unsure How To Proceed Concerning Rose  
GA: She Spends All Day Moping Around The House  
GA: She Barely Eats  
GA: She Is All But Disinterested In Sexual Relations  
GA: And I Am Afraid That My Attempts To Pry The Details Of Her Mental State From Her Have Only Served To Make Things Worse  
GA: I Want To Help Her But I Do Not Want To Make Her Angry  
CG: IT SOUNDS LIKE SHE NEEDS TO GET OVER HER PATHETIC MOPING SELF AND TALK TO YOU LIKE A FUCKING ADULT.  
GA: But Given That She Is The Hurting Party Do You Not Think I Should Give Her Some Additional Leeway  
CG: BEING HURT IS NO GODDAMN EXCUSE TO SHUT OUT THE PEOPLE YOU CARE ABOUT.  
CG: AND BY THE WAY, THIS ISN’T YOUR FAULT.  
GA: It Certainly Seems Like It Is  
CG: OK, SURE, MAYBE YOU WERE PLAYING WITH FIRE WHEN YOU CONCOCTED YOUR LITTLE FAMILY ROLEPLAY FUNTIME EXPERIENCE, BUT SHE’S THE ONE WHO DOUSED HERSELF IN OIL AND LEFT MATCHES LYING AROUND.  
GA: I Am Not Sure I Follow  
CG: WHAT I MEAN IS, SHE’S ALL MESSED UP INSIDE BECAUSE OF HER OWN PERSONAL ISSUES, AND JUST BECAUSE YOU PUSHED HER OVER THE PRECIPICE OF INTROSPECTIVE ENLIGHTENMENT THAT BROUGHT HER THERE DOESN’T MEAN IT’S YOUR FAULT THOSE FEELINGS EXISTED IN THE FIRST PLACE.  
CG: IN FACT, YOU DID HER A FAVOR, LETTING HER DEAL WITH IT NOW.  
CG: SO SHE SHOULD BE GRATEFUL INSTEAD OF SNAPPING AT YOU WHEN YOU TRY TO FUCKING HELP EVEN MORE.  
CG: DOES SHE EVEN UNDERSTAND HOW INFURIATINGLY LUCKY SHE IS TO HAVE YOU?  
CG: YOU ARE THE MOST INCREDIBLE PERSON I CAN THINK OF AND THOSE OF US FORTUNATE ENOUGH TO CALL YOU A QUADRANTMATE SHOULD PRAY TO EVERY GOD WE CAN IMAGINE JUST IN CASE ONE OF THEM MIGHT HAVE A FAKENESS ATTRIBUTE LOW ENOUGH, AND MIGHT CARE ENOUGH, TO GRANT US THE GIFT OF YOUR PRESENCE FOR ONE MORE OTHERWISE HELLISH SECOND.  
GA: <>  
CG: <>  
GA: What Do You Think I Should Do?  
CG: TELL HER WHAT I TOLD YOU.  
CG: TELL HER SHE CAN’T SHUT YOU OUT.  
CG: AS FOR HER MOBIUS DOUBLE MOTHER CRAVING, SHE NEEDS TO EITHER GIVE UP AND BE HAPPY WITH JUST ONE AMAZING MATESPRIT, OR GET OVER HERSELF AND JUST GO FOR IT.  
GA: I Do Not Think She Would Take Any Of That Very Well  
CG: OF COURSE SHE’S NOT GOING TO TAKE IT WELL.  
CG: BUT SHE NEEDS TO HEAR IT.  
GA: I Am Frightened That She Will Resent Me For it  
CG: HERE YOU ARE QUESTIONING MY UNDENIABLY CORRECT ADVICE AGAIN.  
GA: Karkat  
CG: WHAT?  
GA: Precious Karkat  
CG: NO.  
GA: Karkat Who Is So Wise And Knowledgeable In All Things  
CG: I’M NOT DOING IT.  
GA: Sweet Wonderful Karkat Who Is The Best Moirail In Paradox Space  
CG: FUCK YOU.  
GA: Please  
CG: GOD DAMN IT.  
GA: Karkat  
GA: Please  
CG: FINE OK.  
CG: I’LL TALK TO HER.  
CG: BUT LET THE RECORD SHOW THAT I WAS COERCED INTO THIS.  
GA: The Record Is Quite Clear On The Subject.  
CG: GOOD.  
GA: Thank You Karkat  
GA: And My Implication That You Are The Best Moirail In Paradox Space Was Not Merely A Form Of Coercion  
GA: I Really Do Believe It To Be True  
CG: I KNOW.  
CG: I’LL LET YOU KNOW HOW IT GOES.

carcinoGeneticist [CG] ceased trolling grimAuxiliatrix [GA]

carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling tentacleTherapist [TT]

CG: OK, FIRST OF ALL, DON’T BLAME KANAYA BECAUSE THIS WAS ENTIRELY MY IDEA AND SHE TRIED TO STOP ME.  
CG: SECOND OF ALL, I KNOW YOU DON’T LIKE ME BUT THERE’S SOME SHIT YOU NEED TO HEAR.  
TT: I like you just fine.  
CG: OH.  
CG: I MEAN I JUST ASSUMED, CONSIDERING WE HAVEN’T SPOKEN SINCE KANAYA’S LAST DINNER PARTY.  
TT: If you are referring to the incident during which you did verbal battle with the salad platter for almost thirty minutes, passed out, and then called all of us humans a bunch of carrot-loving hop creatures when we wrested you from your vegetable-rage-induced slumber, I found it to be more amusing than truly aggravating.  
CG: WHO THE FUCK EVEN EATS ROOTS THOUGH?  
TT: Carrot-loving hop creatures, I am to believe.  
TT: And as for the aforementioned fecal matter I am required to listen to, please save your admittedly nigh-endless breath.  
TT: Or keystrokes as the case may be.  
TT: I am done speaking about the subject, even with self-proclaimed experts.  
CG: SEE THAT RIGHT THERE IS THE PROBLEM.  
CG: YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT I’M GOING TO SAY YET AND YOU’RE ALREADY DISMISSING IT AND GETTING PISSY WITH ME.  
CG: BUT UNLIKE KANAYA, I’M NOT AFRAID OF YOU GETTING MAD AT ME, SO SIT DOWN, SHUT UP, AND GET READY TO BE SCHOOLFED SOME HARSH TRUTH, MOTHERFUCKER.  
TT: ...  
CG: WAIT.  
CG: SHIT.  
CG: FORGET THAT LAST PART.  
TT: Would that I could.  
CG: WHAT I’M TRYING TO SAY, UNFORTUNATE YET ACCURATE WORDING ASIDE, IS SHUT UP AND LET ME SAY WHAT I HAVE TO SAY, AND IF YOU NEVER WANT TO TALK TO ME AGAIN AFTERWARDS, FINE, BECAUSE I ALREADY FIGURED YOU DIDN’T LIKE ME BEFORE AND I MANAGED TO CARRY ON ANYWAYS.  
TT: Please just spit it out then and let me get on with my evening.  
CG: OKAY.  
CG: GOOD.  
CG: HERE IT IS THEN.  
CG: YOU NEED TO GET OVER YOURSELF AND STOP TREATING KANAYA LIKE YOUR ENEMY.  
CG: I DON’T CARE WHAT YOUR DO WITH YOUR MUTUAL ANCESTOR, BUT WHATEVER YOU DO, AND HOWEVER IT INEVITABLY BACKFIRES SPECTACULARLY, YOU NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING STEP BACK AND APPRECIATE WHAT YOU ALREADY HAVE BEFORE YOUR OBSESSION WITH WHAT YOU MIGHT GET RUINS EVERYTHING.  
CG: YOU AND I BOTH KNOW KANAYA IS THE BEST THING THAT’S EVER HAPPENED TO YOU, SO FOR YOUR OWN SAKE, PULL YOUR HEAD OUT OF YOUR NAUSEATING HUMAN CHAGRIN TUNNEL AND LET HER BE THERE FOR YOU.  
TT: And you think I don’t already know all of that?  
CG: OH I’M SORRY.  
CG: I JUST FIGURED SINCE YOU HAVEN’T DONE JACK SHIT ABOUT IT THAT MAYBE YOU WERE JUST BLIND TO YOUR OWN PROBLEMS LIKE A NORMAL GODDAMN PERSON.  
CG: BUT I FORGOT YOU KNOW EVERYTHING, SO I GUESS YOU’RE JUST TOO MUCH OF A CLUCKBEASTSHIT TO ACTUALLY DO WHAT YOU NEED TO DO.  
CG: OR HAVE YOU SNAPPED AND GONE FULL VILLAIN?  
TT: I am at most part villain, and as such will be refraining from attempting any bank robberies in the near future.  
CG: AVOID THE ISSUE ALL YOU WANT, BUT EVENTUALLY YOU’RE GOING TO HAVE TO ASK YOURSELF, IF YOU REALLY DO KNOW THIS SHIT, WHY YOU HAVEN’T DONE ANYTHING ABOUT IT.  
TT: I’m one step ahead of you again, as I have already posed said question.  
CG: AMAZING.  
CG: WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE, THEN?  
TT: If it’s any consolation, you may have indirectly provided the answer to the question posed.  
CG: AND WHAT IS THIS MYSTICAL ANSWER THAT I HAVE BESTOWED UPON YOU?  
TT: It’s simple, really.  
TT: I have done nothing because I am paralyzed with knowledge and foresight.  
TT: In every course of action I consider, I see a great potential for emotional devastation.  
TT: So all I need to do is stop looking.  
TT: Live in the moment, if you will.  
CG: IF THAT MEANS YOU’LL STOP TAKING KANAYA FOR GRANTED, THEN GREAT.  
CG: DO THAT.  
TT: Your tirade was exasperating and unnecessary, but it did bear fruit in the end, despite the staggering odds stacked against it.  
CG: I’M SO FUCKING HAPPY FOR YOU I COULD VOMIT.  
TT: And for the record, I still don’t dislike you.  
TT: Not that you care either way, of course.

tentacleTherapist [TT] ceased pestering carcinoGeneticist [CG]

Rose closed her laptop and stood from the armchair she had inhabited for the better part of the past two hours. She made her way to the adjacent couch where Kanaya sat with her own computer. Plopped down, she curled up against the troll. “Thank you for worrying about me, Kanaya.”

carcinoGeneticist [CG] began trolling grimAuxiliatrix [GA]

CG: I’M NOT SURE WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED, BUT I THINK IT WENT WELL?  
CG: I MEAN, SHE KIND OF IGNORED ME, BUT SEEMED TO KNOW WHAT I WAS TALKING ABOUT ANYWAY.  
CG: BUT SHE GOT A LITTLE WEIRD AT THE END THERE.  
CG: ARE YOU WITH HER RIGHT NOW?  
CG: DOES SHE LOOK OKAY TO YOU?  
CG: KANAYA?  
CG: ARE YOU TWO FIGHTING?  
CG: ARE YOU MAKING OUT?  
CG: DID ROSE GO CRAZY AND FLIP YOUR ROMANCE PITCH?  
CG: OKAY, IN ANY CASE, I HOPE IT GOES WELL.  
CG: GET BACK TO ME WHEN YOU CAN.

carcinoGeneticist [CG] ceased trolling grimAuxiliatrix [GA]  
grimAuxiliatrix [GA] began trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG]

GA: Everything Is Fine Now  
GA: Thank You Again  
CG: YEAH YEAH.  
GA: <>  
CG: <>

grimAuxiliatrix [GA] ceased trolling carcinoGeneticist [CG]

******

The doorbell rang a second time before Rose made it all the way downstairs and across the spacious livingroom. Normally she would have ample warning before a guest arrived thanks to her Sight, but Roxy was difficult to discern by such methods. Rose would usually find this fact irritating, but in this case it was exactly what she needed.

Rose pulled the door open to reveal Roxy standing on the doorstep, squinting at the light that now poured out into the night. Rose took advantage of this momentary disorientation to take a long look at the girl in front of her without being observed herself. Roxy wore an impressively tiny blue dress that left very little of her flawless skin to the imagination.

Rose had initially considered wearing something similarly revealing. But given that she did not know how the night would progress, she instead chose her usual T-shirt and simple skirt. With her favorite purple lace underneath, just in case.

“Good evening.” Rose finally pulled her gaze away from Roxy’s legs.

“Hey there.” Roxy’s attempt to sound charming and casual failed spectacularly. Her voice cracked. She made eye contact for a fraction of a second before fixing her eyes on the floor. Her hand reached out to lean on a railing or wall but found none, leaving her hand to pat awkwardly at the air.

“Please, come in.” Rose maintained a much more confident air, but only through years of practice. Underneath the surface, her head was spinning. Sweet perfume Filled Rose’s Nose. Why did Roxy have to smell so good? Visual temptation was expected, but Rose had forgotten about scent.

Roxy stepped through the door and into the living room. Rose’s heart raced. She thought that obfuscating her powers of foresight by being in Roxy’s presence would be calming. She thought she would be able to concentrate on the present, and decide the best course of action without vague visions of all the possible ways it could end catastrophically plaguing her.

Or she thought that she thought those things. Or at least she wanted to think that she thought those things. Or maybe she just thought she wanted to think that she thought those things? Or she wanted to want to think that she thought that thinking… thinking was getting hard.

She decided what she thought was unimportant right now anyways and so what if she had invited Roxy here under the false pretense of rational decision-making? Her plan was still working. She was living in the now. The now was just a whole lot hazier and alluring than she had imagined. And so very, very soft. And hot. And wet. And—

Rose pulled away from the kiss and released Roxy’s derriere from the firm grip she apparently had on it. “Um,” she managed, stepping back.

Roxy blinked in a daze, regaining what little composure she had. “So… Does this mean you’ve made up your mind then?”

“I had hoped to have a more eloquent exchange before making any decisions. Perhaps discuss our feelings over a hot beverage of some sort.”

“Really?” Roxy’s head tilted. “I mean I thought since you invited me over here...”

“The implications had crossed my mind.”

“Do you, um, want to just talk then?” Roxy’s expression alternated between hope and disappointment.

“I don’t know.”

“Oh...” Disappointment began to win out.

“It is, however, a different sort of not knowing than I am accustomed to.” Rose smiled and made her way past the other girl to the still open door. “Normally if I don’t know something, it’s because I am inundated with too vast an array of information to properly parse, and as such, simply not knowing at all is a pleasant change of pace.”

The door latched shut with a click. Roxy stood motionless, as if her slightest movement would spook Rose like an elegant deer she had happened upon in the woods.

Rose’s arms slid around Roxys stomach from behind, pulling her into an embrace. “I guess I’ll just have to follow my gut instincts for now.” Roxy shivered and let out a gasp as Rose’s breath passed over her neck.

Her scent was even more intoxicating in such close proximity. Her taste even more so. Rose’s tongue teased lightly behind Roxy’s ear. “And my instinct has some fascinating ideas that I would like to explore, if you’ll indulge them.”

A faint squeak and a nod were all the answer Roxy could manage. Rose’s hand slipped between her legs and under her dress, fingers caressing through her rapidly dampening undergarments. Roxy’s legs buckled and she tumbled to the floor with an awful thud, bringing Rose down behind her.

Rose was the first to break out laughing, with Roxy soon to follow.

“I’m sorry,” Rose managed, propping herself up with one arm to look down on Roxy, who now lay on her back. “Did I make you lose your balance?”

“Pffthaha,” Roxy articulately began. “Maybe a— heheh— a little.”

“You ought to be more careful.” Rose bent down, still barely containing laughter. Her lips pressed against Roxy’s, and then parted, ending in a deep kiss.

“Are you both alright?” Kanaya’s voice called from across the room.

Rose continued the kiss for a few seconds more, then reluctantly pulled away once more to look up at her half concerned, half amused matesprit. “We are quite alright. Roxy simply appears to become especially clumsy when confronted with a hand up her skirt.”

Roxy’s face turned bright red. “Hi, Kanaya.” She waved tentatively at the troll looming above her.

“Hello, Roxy.” Kanaya smiled. “How are you this evening?”

“Well I fell over.” Roxy continued to lie flat on the ground. “But then there was this really pretty girl making out with me. So over all, I’d say I’m doing pretty good.”

Rose and Kanaya both fought the urge to correct her grammar. Rose lost the battle first. “Pretty well.”

“Yeah, that.” Roxy rolled her eyes, but continued smiling like a doofus.

Kanay chuckled. “Would you perhaps like to choose a more comfortable location than the floor for your making out, if I am not too bold in assuming that it is to continue?”

Rose pulled herself to her feet, and offered a hand to Roxy. “Is she too bold?”

Roxy shook her head, took Rose’s hand, and climbed back to a standing position. “Not if it’s okay with you.”

“Of course.”

“Then might I suggest the bedroom.” Kanaya gestured to the stairs. “Where it will be easier to observe without intruding. If that does not make you too uncomfortable, Roxy.”

Roxy nodded. “I’ve never had an audience before. John’s not really into that kinda thing. But I think it’s kinda exciting.”

The trio proceeded up the stairs and into the bedroom, where Rose and Kanaya repositioned the two stage lights to their optimal locations. Kanaya pulled the chain to turn off the ceiling light, leaving only the bed illuminated. But for Kanaya’s soft breathing in the darkness, Rose and Roxy seemed to be alone, sitting at the edge of the bed.

“So...” Roxy’s eyes fixated diligently on her hands, folded on her lap.

“Yes.” Rose turned turned to face the other girl. “Now that we are quite literally on the spot, I am not entirely sure how to proceed. Perhaps a return to our previous state, updated to fit our new surroundings?”

“You mean kissin’ me while I’m on my back?”

“Precisely.”

“Okay.” Roxy turned and hopped onto the bed. “Lemme just—” She began to crawl behind Rose, caught her foot, and plopped down, face first, onto the array of frilly pillows that made up the head of the bed. “Perfect,” her muffled voice affirmed.

Rose stood and turned around. “I think I can work with this.” Kneeling on the bed beside Roxy, her hands headed straight for her prone bedmate’s legs. Her fingertips brushed upwards, ultimately finding themselves where cloth met wonderfully soft flesh. She began to push against the dress, slowly exposing more skin, and soon the pink of Roxy’s panties. “Yes, this will do just fine.”

Rose bent down and planted a kiss on Roxy’s beautiful, plump butt, and squeezed the other cheek with her hand. A new, even more intoxicating scent entered Rose’s nose, no doubt emanating from the obvious wet spot between Roxy’s legs. A matter that would need attending to soon, but delayed gratification had become an art for Rose. She reached up to unzip Roxy’s dress, letting her fingers caress the skin that they exposed as she parted the fabric. She unhooked Roxy’s bra, leaving her upper back entirely exposed.

Roxy’s hands firmly gripped the pillow in which her face was buried. Rose’s lips softly touched against her back and shoulders, tongue occasionally flittering out. Soft moans emanated from inside the pillow, and Roxy’s toes curled.

Rose’s hand wandered back between Roxy’s legs, leaving her lips and tongue to continue their work. Her fingers roamed about, teasing at the idea they might find their way back to where they had caused a most unfortunate tumble earlier.

Rose’s lips made their way up, kissing and licking at Roxy’s neck. “Roxy...” she whispered. “I want you so much, Roxy.” Her fingers found their mark, slowly making circles around the wet portion of undergarment. The muffled moans grew rapidly louder. “I want to touch you. Taste you. Make you scream my name in pleasure.”

Roxy’s head turned, gasping at air. “Oh god, Rose. Please, yes!”

Rose’s fingers curled around the edge of Roxy’s underwear, pushing the now soaked fabric out of the way just enough to push her index and middle fingers inside of the moaning girl, where she continued her circular movements, now pressing downward, where she assumed Roxy’s G-spot would be, based on her experience teaching Kanaya about her own anatomy. A loud, incomprehensible exclamation told her she was close enough, at least.

“Oh, fuck, Rose! I’m gonna come.”

“Do it. Come for me, Roxy. Come from my touch.”

Roxy’s body tensed, and breathed in sharply. “Rose!” Her muscles squeezed Rose’s fingers rhythmically. Her knuckles turned white gripping at her pillow. Short breaths became the only sound she made.

Rose waited until the spasms stopped to remove her fingers and bring them to her lips.

Roxy twisted and flopped herself over onto her back, still breathing heavily. “So that worked out well.”

“Yes.” Rose continued to lick at her wet fingers. A taste so similar to her own, and yet subtly different. “Exquisite. Don’t you agree?” She offered the digits to Roxy, who took them eagerly into her mouth, her tongue flicking and swirling.

Rose retracted her hand, replacing her fingers with her own tongue. Roxy pulled her closer, almost frantically kissing back. The world outside the two of them melted away. Rose could think of nothing beyond now. Beyond giving Roxy all of the pleasure she deserved. Beyond showing the love she knew she always should have.

Rose finally broke from the kiss and sat back up onto her knees. “I believe I should like to taste more of you.” She took the edges of Roxy’s panties. Roxy lifted her torso long enough for the garment to slip off easily.

“Rosey, don’t you think it’s your turn to—”

“If it is my turn, then this is the move I choose to make.” Rose moved to kneel at Roxy’s feet, then bent forward, meeting no resistance as she pushed Roxy’s legs to either side.

Forgoing her usual routine of teasing, Rose went straight for Roxy’s exposed vulva, spreading her labia apart and licking from bottom to top.

Roxy yelped as Rose’s tongue reached her clit. “Rose,” she gasped. “Still really sensitive...”

“Would you like me to stop?” Rose tilted her head up, allowing her eyes to meet Roxy’s gaze.

“God no. Just be careful.”

“Very well. I shall tread lightly.” Rose returned to her previous endeavor, licking up and down and up and down, each time careful to stop just before reaching the most sensitive spot. Lapping at wet fingers had been a feeble imitation compared to the intense, wonderful flavor and aroma that now consumed her senses. She pressed her tongue as far inside of Roxy as she could with each upward motion, tasting as much as possible.

“Yessss.” Roxy’s fingers wrapped themselves in Rose’s hair. Her hips began to move up and down, her breathing growing heavier. “Rose...”

Roxy’s motions grew faster, and Rose followed suit. Roxy’s fingers pulled at Rose’s hair, dragging her closer. She tugged harder each time Rose’s tongue brushed past her clit. Receiving the message, Rose ceased her avoidance of the area, first passing over it with each lick, then moving entirely to circles and criss-crosses over the now appropriately sensitive spot.

“C-coming,” was all Roxy could manage as another orgasm washed over her.

When the fingers in her hair finally loosened, Rose sat back up. “It seems a number of the techniques gained from practise with a nook work on you as well.”

“The fact that you’re a total hottie doesn’t hurt either.”

“Look who’s talking.” Rose crawled forward, straddling Roxy’s hips. She bent down for another passionate kiss, her lips, nose, and chin still wet from Roxy’s loins.

When the kiss finally ended, Roxy grinned. “Now I insist that it’s your turn.”

“But I’ve just taken my turn. Don’t you remember?”

“Right. Okay.” Roxy pondered for a moment. “Then for my turn, I’m gonna make you come. If that’s not against the rules we are now following.”

“That is well within the rules. But first there is a logistical phase.”

“A logistical phase?”

Rose pulled her shirt up over her head and tossed it aside, making sure to avoid the the room’s center. She wouldn’t want to pelt her matesprit with wanton clothing, and it would be awkward if it ended up in Kanaya’s bucket.

“I see.” Roxy pulled herself up onto her elbows, then into a sitting position, leaving her legs underneath Rose. She tugged at her dress and bra, pulling both of the undone garments over her head in one motion. She dropped both over the edge of the bed.

Rose leaned forward once more, pushing Roxy back into the pile of decorative pillows. Rather than move in for another kiss, Rose aimed lower. Taking Roxy’s nipple in her mouth, she suckled gently, while her hand caressed Roxy’s other breast.

“Fuck...” Roxy closed her eyes and sank a little deeper into her frilly nest. Then her eyes snapped open. “Hey, this isn’t logistical at all.”

Rose released the nipple in her mouth, but played with the other between her fingers. “There are subtleties to the logistical phase that are difficult to articulate.”

“Well phase over, missy.” Roxy put on the most disapproving face she could while still uncontrollably grinning. “It’s my turn now and I say you finish taking off your clothes.”

Rose didn’t think she could be any more turned on, but that was turning out to be inaccurate. “Very well.” Rose unfastened her bra and discarded it. “But only because I like it when you tell me what to do.”

“Ohhh yeah?” Roxy giggled. “Then trade places with me!”

Rose nodded, and moved off of Roxy, waiting for her to get up before taking her place against the pillow wall.

Roxy in turn took Rose’s place, kneeling over her. “Perfect.”

“Would you like me to continue removing clothing?”

“Nah, I got it. Just lift your butt when I do, okay?”

“Yes, ma’am.” Rose nodded again.

“Hey,” Roxy’s grin disappeared for the first time since she came. “I like where this is goin’, but I’d rather avoid titles like that, if that’s okay.”

“Yes, I wasn’t sure what title you would prefer.”

“Just Roxy is fine.”

“Very well, Roxy.”

“So you like to get told what to do?”

“Yes, Roxy.”

Roxy’s grin returned, this time with a mischievous edge. “And you like to be watched?”

“Very much, Roxy.”

“Then I changed my mind.” Roxy sat back, just past Rose’s feet. “I think you should finish disrobin’ yourself.”

“Yes, Roxy.” Rose pulled down her skirt and panties together, and continued to discard the articles with care.

“Now spread your legs.”

“Yes, Roxy.” Rose complied, revealing her nearly dripping pussy.

“Now touch yourself.” Roxy leaned down on her elbows between Rose’s legs, leaving her face a just few inches away. “I wanna see up close.”

“Yes, Roxy.” Rose’s hands, previous held still at her sides awaiting command, sprang to action. She took a breast in one, while the other began to trace up and down her soaking wet slit. She began to moan, her volume only very slightly exaggerated for the benefit of her now two onlookers.

“But don’t make yourself come.” Roxy’s eyes followed Rose’s fingers, watching them circle her clit, stroke down, into her hole, then back up to circle again. “I’m gonna make that happen myself.”

“Yes—” Rose took a deep breath. “—Roxy.”

Roxy watched for a few moments more, then pushed herself up to Rose’s unattended breast, where she licked circles around the erect nipple.

“Roxy...” Rose moaned. “Please...”

“Please what, Rosey?”

“Please hurt me.” Rose’s fingers moved faster, and her legs squirmed in pleasure.

“Umm,” Roxy puzzled. “How do you wanna be hurt?”

“Please… bite me...”

“Like on the neck?” She tilted her head to the side.

“Nipple. Please.” Rose could barely make words.

Roxy’s smile returned. “Ohh.” She wrapped her lips, then her teeth, around Rose’s nipple, and bit down lightly.

Rose gasped. “H—harder.“

Roxy bit down again, pressing down just a little harder and longer.

Rose’s moans grew louder. “Please harder!”

Roxy bit a third time, this time much harder.

Rose screamed in pain and pleasure as she came violently, squeezing her other nipple hard between her fingers and thrashing her legs about.

“Hey,” Roxy feigned disapproval. “I was supposed to make you do that.”

Rose lay motionless save her heavy breathing, staring at the ceiling. “Technically, your teeth pushed me over the edge.”

“Hmm...” Roxy stroked her chin ponderously.

“Hmm?”

Roxy lay down next to Rose, leaving her head on Rose’s breast. “Yes, hmm.”

“What does hmm mean, besides the obvious?” Rose looked down at Roxy.

“I have decided that I will count the technicality. But it won’t fly next time.”

“Next time meaning...”

“Well in a few minutes if you’re up to it, but also... um...”

“Yes, I would like to do this again another time, Roxy.” Rose chuckled. “As for a few minutes from now, I think I would prefer to refrain for the time being.”

“Okay.”

“Roxy dear,” Kanaya’s voice came from the darkness. “Will you be staying the night?”

“Um, can I?” Roxy looked at Rose.

Rose smiled at her. “I would prefer if you did.”

The room light turned on with a click to reveal Kanaya standing under it, holding a metal bucket now partially filled with a greenish fluid. She stepped to the bedside, bent over, kissed Rose’s forehead, and smiled. “I’ll leave you two be then.”

“Oh, I don’t want to kick you out of your own bed.” Concern washed over Roxy’s face.

“I assure you it is no problem at all. I have the privilege of living with Rose every day.” Kanaya stepped to each of the stage lights and switched them off. “I will be in the guest room if you need anything.”

Rose waved as Kanaya left the room. “I love you, Kanaya.”

“I love you too, Rose. Sleep well.” Kanaya stepped out of the room and latched the door behind her.

******

grimAuxiliatrix [GA] began trolling ectoBiologist [EB]

GA: It Seems That Roxy Will Be Spending The Night Here  
EB: oh, so it went well then??  
GA: Yes  
GA: It Went Very Well  
EB: that’s great!  
EB: and how are you doing with all this?  
EB: i mean, i know the two of you haven’t done the whole poly thing before.  
EB: but then i guess trolls usually do something kind of similar.  
EB: but also totally different!  
EB: haha!  
GA: Yes Jealousy Within A Single Quadrant Is As Common As With Humans  
GA: But I Am Experiencing Only Happiness For Them  
GA: Not That I Did Not Get Anything Out Of The Situation  
EB: ohhh, did you get to watch?  
GA: Yes  
EB: wow! how was that?  
GA: Incredible  
EB: i’m so glad for you!  
EB: all three of you!  
EB: roxy was really worried it wouldn’t work out.  
EB: but i thought it probably would.  
EB: i told her she is all kinds of awesome, so why wouldn’t rose want to have tons and tons of sex with her?  
EB: and look, i was right!  
GA: Thank You For Your Assistance In Making This Possible.  
EB: hey, i barely did anything.  
EB: so thank yourself!  
GA: I Think Perhaps Thanking Oneself Is A Little Bit Odd  
EB: well then i’ll do it for you.  
EB: thank you kanaya for helping roxy be so happy.  
GA: In That Case You Are Welcome  
GA: But I Should Get To Bed Now  
GA: I Just Wanted To Make Sure You Knew Where Roxy Was  
EB: ok, thank you kanaya.  
EB: goodnight!  
GA: Goodnight John

grimAuxiliatrix [GA] ceased trolling ectoBiologist [EB]

******

A flash of images rushed over Rose, vague and unfocused. She could see Roxy sitting alone somewhere, hugging her knees and crying. She saw herself, screaming at Kanaya over something. She could feel the seething anger. She saw Roxy throwing a bottle across a room. John was there. Was the bottle aimed at him? She saw Kanaya and Roxy looking down on her, concerned, and could feel intense shame and self-loathing.

Rose snapped back to reality as the flood subsided. She sat alone on the couch, knitting needles clenched in her hands. She had hoped that Roxy’s void influence would last longer after her departure that morning. Clearly her hopes had been too high, as only two hours had passed.

Her visions were usually, for the most part, under her control. She would attempt to view a fortuitous future, and she would receive a vision of the path to that future, or occasionally of a path to avoid. Sometimes, the visions came on their own, usually as a warning, showing her the terrible results of her current course of action.

Where Roxy was concerned, future sight became more complicated. Her void prevented perfect viewing of any future that involved her. The more she was involved, the less reliable the sight. Attempts could be made anyways, but their accuracy was questionable, and the information gained was full of holes. By viewing many possible futures, and picking out small, related pieces, Rose could make some deductions, but the entire process was frustrating and unreliable.

Rose had focused the majority of her attention over the past eight days on this very process, looking for any commonalities between what looked, from the limited data, to be positive futures, and hoping to find a path that included these shared details, but also involved indulging in her desire to be with Roxy.

The endeavor had been largely disheartening, especially when uncontrolled visions, like the ones she had just experiences, began to come with much greater frequency. Unwelcome warnings that she would prefer to do without.

******

tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering tipsyGnostalgic [TG]

TT: I see you have gotten home safely.  
TG: yep  
TG: train was a little late  
TG: but when isnt it  
TG: amirite  
TT: You are indeed “rite.”  
TG: :p  
TT: Are you are still feeling alright about last night?  
TG: yea!  
TG: i mean  
TG: if you are  
TG: that is  
TT: Yes, I am feeling quite alright about last night.  
TT: In fact, I was wondering when you might like to do it again.  
TG: ummm  
TG: i think im free tuesday  
TG: cept in the mornin  
TT: Tuesday works for me.  
TT: Though I must admit I was hoping for sooner.  
TG: i no  
TG: three whole days without touchin ur hot booty  
TG: is alot  
TG: ;)  
TT: Yes, but I suppose we shall have to hold out.  
TG: johns gonna need the car  
TG: but theres a train that gets to u at 2  
TG: hows that?  
TT: Perfect.  
TG: sweet  
TG: ill c you then!  
TT: Indeed.  
TG: ok  
TG: so  
TG: bye for now!  
TG: :*  
TG: thats a kissy face btw  
TT: I see.  
TT: :* back at you then.  
TG: :)

tentacleTherapist [TT] ceased pestering tipsyGnostalgic [TG]

******

Shattered glass and blood. Rose couldn’t breath. Kanaya stood over her, panicking. Roxy sat in a hospital waiting room, holding back tears. Kanaya shouted at Karkat. Rose could feel intense fear, surrounded by inky blackness. She tried to reassure Kanaya, who was upset about… it didn’t matter. Rose’s words were nothing but static.

Rose awoke in a cold sweat, the room still dark except for the faint moonlight that shone through the window. She checked the time. 12:40. Roxy had left only an hour ago.

******

grimAuxiliatrix [GA] began trolling ectoBiologist [EB]

GA: You Are Somewhat Of An Expert On Polyamory  
GA: Are You Not  
EB: i guess you could say that.  
EB: but really no one’s ever an expert, because of how complicated it always is.  
GA: Perhaps You Will Still Be Able To Answer A Question For Me Then  
EB: i’ll try my best!  
GA: Thank You  
GA: My Question Is  
GA: Is it Normal For A New Relationship To Be A Central Focus For A Time  
GA: While It Is Established  
GA: Or Should I Be Concerned That Rose Seems To Be More Excited About Seeing Roxy Than Being With Me  
EB: well, it’s totally normal for any relationship to have a kind of “honeymoon phase” where it’s all new and exciting, but rose definitely shouldn’t be making you feel less important because of that.  
EB: you should talk to her and let her know if you’re feeling left out or anything.  
EB: i’m sure she doesn’t mean it!  
EB: managing time is really one of the hardest parts of poly, so just make sure she knows she needs to make time for you, too.  
GA: That Is Very Helpful  
GA: Thank You John  
EB: any time!!  
EB: i remember when we were new to this, and it was really confusing, so it’s great to be able to pass on some of what we’ve learned.  
GA: I Will Be Sure To Come To You With Any Other Question I May Have Then  
EB: great!  
EB: is there anything else right now?  
GA: No  
GA: I Believe My Thirst For Knowledge Has Been Sated For The Time Being  
GA: And I Should Talk To Rose Now  
EB: ok!  
EB: i’ll talk to you later then.

grimAuxiliatrix [GA] ceased trolling ectoBiologist [EB]

******

This time the visions hit almost immediately. Rose made it to the end of Roxy and John’s driveway before her senses were bombarded with scenes ranging from unpleasant to horrifying. Her friends sometimes miserable, sometimes injured, sometimes dead. Fighting. Yelling. Pain and anger.

She gathered herself from the pavement when it finally passed, and resisted the urge to run back inside. She would only worry Roxy and John, who would tell Kanaya. Visions were nothing new. No one else needed to be bothered with them.

******

tentacleTherapist [TT] began pestering tipsyGnostalgic [TG]

TT: I need to see you again.  
TG: wow  
TG: needs a strong word  
TG: ;)  
TT: It feels appropriate though.  
TG: i totes agree  
TG: when did you have in mind?  
TG: i’m free tomorrow  
TG: if your need is urgent  
TG: are you free then?  
TG: rose?  
TG: are you there?  
TG: hellooooo?  
TT: Yes, sorry.  
TT: I was momentarily distracted.  
TT: Are you sure you aren’t available this evening?  
TG: in that big of a hurry huh?  
TG: i must be makin a good impression  
TT: That does not quite answer my question.  
TG: uh  
TG: right  
TG: sry  
TG: but its date nite w john  
TG: gotta appease the ol vall and chain right?  
TG: *ball  
TT: I see.  
TT: That is unfortunate.  
TT: But I will see you tomorrow at least?  
TG: sure thing  
TG: i can take the train straight from work  
TT: Excellent.  
TG: yes  
TG: so  
TG: hows ur day been?  
TT: There is not much to say about it.  
TT: And in any case, I have to go.  
TT: Let me know when you’re leaving tomorrow?  
TG: oh  
TG: yea  
TG: i will  
TT: Good.

tentacleTherapist [TT] ceased pestering tipsyGnostalgic [TG]

TG: i love you  
TG: :(

****** 

Four hours. Roxy would be there in four hours. Rose paced back and forth. It was too long. Her head was killing her. When would another vision strike? They were always looming. Always on her mind. She had begun timing them, and they were not growing more frequent, but it felt as if they were now always on the verge of appearing, waiting just outside of view. Stalking. Not like before, when they would return to whence they came to rest between visits. 

Spending time with Kanaya helped. It felt normal. Comfortable. And when Kanaya had asked for them to spend more scheduled time together, it seemed to lift the burden of waiting. But her Sight was always there in the back of her mind anyways. 

Not like when she was with Roxy. With Roxy, she could let go. Just live, and not have to worry. The nights she spent with Roxy were the only ones where she felt well rested. But she never really needed to sleep well every night of the week anyways. So long as she could spend just two, maybe three nights a week with her, that would be enough. 

Three hours, fifty-nine minutes. How had it only been a minute since she last checked the clock? 

****** 

_Ding-dong!_

The ring of the bell was piercing and startled Rose from her slumber. She must have fallen asleep on the couch while waiting. Well that’s one way to pass the time. 

She stood, intending to rush to the door, but dizziness overcame her and she fell back onto the couch. Getting up too fast is never a good idea. 

She tried again, and this time managed to keep her balance. The dizziness persisted though. How deep had her sleep been? She checked the clock, to make sure she hadn’t dozed through her date. The numbers were blurry, but she managed to make them out anyways. 6:22pm. At least that was right. 

She stumbled to the door, and pulled it open, balancing on the handle. 

“I’m here!” Roxy stood in the doorway waving. 

“So you are.” Rose smiled. Everything would be alright now. No more worries. 

****** 

tipsyGnostalgic [TG] began pestering grimAuxiliatrix [GA]

TG: kanaya  
TG: you have to come home rtight now  
TG: fuck kanays ate you there?  
GA: Yes I Am Here  
GA: What Is Wrong  
TG: rose is durnk  
TG: *drunk  
TG: !!!!  
TG: i dont know what to sdo!  
GA: Are You Sure  
GA: Are You With Her Right Now  
TG: yea  
TG: she says shes fine but shes obisouisly not  
TG: thers a hald empty bottle o vodka om the floor  
GA: I Am On My Way Home Now  
GA: It Will Take Approximately Ten Minutes  
GA: Please Take Care Of Her While I Am In Transit  
TG: ok  
TG: hurry

tipsyGnostalgic [TG] ceased pestering grimAuxiliatrix [GA]

****** 

The door flung open and Kanaya rushed inside, followed closely by Karkat. Thank god. Maybe Kanaya would know what to do. 

Rose lay on the couch. Roxy had finally convinced her to lie down, though she suspected it was because Rose believe they were going to fuck on the couch. She had been nothing but affectionate since Roxy arrived, which was much less charming than usual. She refused to acknowledge her condition, instead silencing any insistence of the truth with a finger over Roxy’s mouth, or an attempted slobbery kiss. 

“How is she?” Kanaya knelt down beside Roxy, who was sitting against the couch. 

“I’m fiiine.” Rose answered the question herself. “Why d’you keep worryning? Ev’rything’s okay. Roxy’s here now.” 

“I am here too, Rose.” Kanaya was usually difficult to read. Calm and collected. Seeing her this visibly worried was jarring. “I am here to help you. Now, how much did you have to drink?” 

“Kanyaya.” Rose reached out a reassuring hand, which fell short and flopped down over the side of the couch. “I don’ drink ‘nymore. You know tha’.” 

“Not enough to be toxic.” Roxy pointed to the half-empty bottle that lay on the floor nearby. “But still more than anyone should drink.” 

“Rose. Sweetie. Look at me.” Kanaya pointed at Rose’s eyes, then at herself. “Why don’t you tell me what you did today? I am interested in your day.” 

Rose giggled. “You always care so mush! But nothing hap’n’d really. It was booooring.” 

“Indulge me, please.” Kanaya took Rose’s hand. 

“Well I got up ‘n’ had breakf’st with you. Then you lef’ an’ I knitt’d for a while. Bu’ then I pu’ them away ‘cause I di’n’t wanna hur’ myself.” 

Kanaya’s grip tightened. “Why would you hurt yourself?” 

“Nooo.” Rose waved her other hand dismissively. “No’ like tha’. Acciden’ly! In case the vis’ns came.” 

“You have been experiencing visions? About what?” 

“Shhhh!” Rose put her finger to her lips. “They can’ get you now. Roxy’s here.” 

Roxy felt a sinking in her stomach. “Is that the only reason you want to be with me?” 

“Noooo.” That same dismissive wave. “I jus’ don’ have t’worry about it fallin’ apar’ when we’re t’gether.” 

Kanaya learned in closer, still clutching Rose’s hand. “Is that what your visions are about?” 

“Wha’?” Rose tilted her head in confusion. “No. No visis. Roxy’s here!” 

Kanaya sighed. “Karkat. Would you please take Roxy home?” 

Karkat stood awkwardly in the middle of the room. “Yeah.” 

“Please let me stay and help.” Roxy’s eyes filled with tears. “This is my fault.” 

“Very well, but you may wish to look away.” Kanaya leaned in closer to Rose until her lips pressed against Rose’s neck. Her mouth opened, and her fangs penetrated skin. 

Rose gasped and moaned. “Ohh, Kanapya. In fron’ of e’rybody?” She gripped Kanaya’s head, breathing heavily, a blissful look on her face. A look that slowly faded, replaced with concern. “Kapaya...? Is tha’ too mush?” 

Roxy reached out to pull Kanaya away, but Karkat pushed her hand down. “Just let this happen. Wouldn’t be the first time.” He looked more sad than angry. It didn’t suit him. 

“Kanana...? Kapna—… Kan—…” Rose trailed off and her body fell limp, her eyes still open. Roxy could barely breathe. Rose was a god. She wouldn’t stay that way. Roxy knew it. But still. Seeing her like that... 

Kanaya sat back. She was breathing heavily, a slight smile on her face. But her eyes looked… terrified? Haunted? An unnatural combination. The trolls usually looked so normal. So human. But as Kanaya licked the blood from her lips, Roxy couldn’t help but notice just how alien she was. 

Karkat knelt beside Kanaya and wrapped his arms around her, his head resting agains her shoulder. She remained motionless, staring straight ahead with unfocused eyes. 

No one moved or spoke for almost a minute, until they heard a bell toll. A flash of light filled the room and Rose sat up with a start. She blinked and scanned the room. “Kanaya, darling?” She smiled, and spoke softly, but her tone suggested that she was not pleased. “Why did you just kill me?” 

“You were inebriated.” Kanaya finally moved, turning her head and focusing her eyes on Rose. Karkat sat back, leaving his hand on Kanaya’s arm. “And you were unable to provide required information in that state.” 

“You can’t just do that, Kanaya.” Rose no longer spoke softly. “Not when we aren’t in immediate danger.” 

“You spoke of disastrous visions, but would not elaborate.” Kanaya was eerily calm. “Without further information, I decided that qualified. And Rose...” Her expression finally shifted. No longer terrifying and alien, she now just looked hurt. “You were drunk, Rose. Do you understand what that means to me?” 

“You should have simply waited!” 

“Why?” Kanaya’s head tilted. “This was more efficient.” 

Rose’s voice fell to a whisper and she looked down at the floor. “What if I deserved it, Kanaya?” 

“Why would you deserve it?” 

“I ignored my visions. I could have stopped this...” Rose turned to Roxy. “I’m so sorry. I just wanted to be with you so badly.” 

“No, Rose.” Roxy’s sinking feeling intensified. She choked back tears. “It’s okay. Everything will be okay. We’ll help you through this.” 

“Roxy...” Rose shook her head. “We can’t do this anymore.” 

“Please don’t say that.” Roxy couldn’t hold the tears back anymore. “Please...” 

Rose bent over to where Roxy still sat and tenderly kissed her lips. “I’m sorry, Roxy.” She ran her fingers through Roxy’s hair. “I need to be alone with Kanaya now.” 

“When—” Roxy sniffled. “When can I see you again?” 

“I don’t know.” Rose shook her head again. “Most likely not for a while. But I will speak with you online, okay?” 

Roxy nodded tentatively. 

****** 

“You didn’t really think that would work out, did you?” Karkat’s voice was startling. Neither he nor Roxy had spoken since they departed twenty minutes prior. 

Roxy sat in the passenger seat of the car, curled up against the door. “I donno. I wanted it to.” 

Karkat paused a while before speaking again. “I’m sorry.” 

“You didn’t do anything wrong.” 

“No, not that kind of sorry. The kind where I’m being fucking sympathetic. Your language is stupid. You know that, right?” Exasperation looked much better on him than uncomfortable sadness. 

****** 

Rose finally stopped her violent twitching and relaxed into Kanaya’s embrace. The two now sat on the couch together, Rose leaning on Kanaya. 

“Were they any better this time?” Kanaya brushed the hair out of Rose’s eyes. 

“A little clearer, at least.” Rose’s voice was weak. “I think a great deal of pain is unavoidable at this point, however. I would not blame you if you did not want to go through it again.” 

“I’m not going anywhere.” Kanaya kissed Rose’s forehead and attempted a smile. 

****** 

Roxy sat alone in her own living room. John had retired to the bedroom hours ago. He suggested she come to bed too, but she wasn’t ready to face the new day that would inevitably follow. 

She had turned the television off soon after John went to bed, and now stared at the wall. She wanted to cry more, but instead she just felt numb. She had finally gotten what she had always wanted. To be with Rose. To kiss her. To feel her love. And now it was gone. A perfect dream that she had been forcibly shaken out of. She wanted to go back, but sleep would bring only nightmares. 

A glass appeared on the coffee table in front of her with a pop. She hadn’t meant to do it. But there it was. An already mixed drink in a fancy little glass. The smell of alcohol wafted off of it. 

The second glass was slightly more deliberate. The third, entirely so. 


End file.
